For the curiously aware of Humboldt County…
By Skippy Massey
Humboldt Sentinel
VETERANS DAY EVENTS: The Eureka Veterans Day Program presented by the Rotary Club of Southwest Eureka will honor veterans of all branches of the armed forces on Friday at 11 a.m. at the Eureka Municipal Auditorium, 1120 F St. Arcata will have a 5K Run/Walk hosted by the Veterans Enrollment and Transition Services Department and the Student Veterans Association Club will take place Friday in the Redwood Bowl at Humboldt State University at 11am. Fortuna’s Salute to Veterans is Friday starting at 2 p.m. at the Veterans Memorial Building, 1426 Main Street, Fortuna. Honor Our Veterans will be presented by Sequoia Springs Assisted Living Friday at 12:30 p.m. at Sequoia Springs, 2401 Redwood Way, in Fortuna, too. The Hoopa Valley Tribe will be honoring veterans on Friday in front of the Hoopa Neighborhood Facilities Building at 11am. Please thank our veterans, love our country, and fly your flag high, folks.
FUNNY MONEY AND 101 SAFETY CORRIDOR FENDER BENDERS: Now you see it, now you don’t. The Board of Supervisors, the Eureka City Council, and the Humboldt County Association of Governments are grappling with the big $23 million Caltrans allotment price tag for the the larger plans of improving Highway 101 between Eureka and Arcata. Yes, it’s a headache for all concerned with many hours of discussions and wrangling set for the future. We’re not so sure it will come together like a fine Swiss watch running faster than the morning commute with so many municipal players wanting their piece of the fiscal pie kept intact.
FISKARS TRIMMERS, TITANS, AND THE LONG ARM OF THE CLAW: Kym Kemp brings us the glaring inconsistency of District Attorney Paul Gallegos seemingly new enforcement slant going after the cannabis trimmers while organizing kingpin Stanislaw Kopiej goes free. Kopiej’s massive $1 million Hydesville marijuana bust and subsequent probation-only plea bargain lies in stark contrast to his bud tending female trimmers getting subsequently soaked and hammered by the DA’s office. He’s free on bail while the trim ladies languish in the 5th Street Salmon Slammer. Birds of a tether do time together, per the iniquitously wobbly scales of justice and Paul Gallegos.
POOP AND PEE GO NATIONAL: Yes, Humboldt is known for towering redwoods, fresh air and clean water, pastoral views and its clandestine marijuana industry. And something else. The infamous Poop and Pee report erupted the local blogosphere wide open with projectile force as the Betsy Lambert/KIEM-TV video goes viral in reaching new heights of in-depth investigative reporting. Only in Humboldt would there an animated cartoon and a soulful ballad appoopriately memorializing this pseudo-historical potty event. Please people, make it go away. Far, far away. Can’t we just find our happy place behind the redwood curtain? Stall? Porta-potty? US Bank?
EMBATTLED ELECTION IMBROGLIO: Elections are rarely sexy and Tuesday’s turnout was true to form. As reported in Wednesday’s Sentinel, the votes are tallied. Incumbent Judy Anderson (42%) soundly lost to newcomer Susan Johnson (57.5%) bidding for Eureka City Schools Trustee and following her televised debate no-show last month. Note to self: simply show up before stiffing an informed electorate– even if only 21% of the voters cast ballots. Notably outspoken citizen regulator, fiscal conservative, and depending who you speak to civil advocate or civic critic David Elsebusch was trounced garnering a slim 14.9% of the vote for McKinleyville’s Community Services District. Arcata’s uniquely original and freewheeling thinker Geronimo Garcia went down in flames with only 4% for Manila Community Services District Director. Security National’s right hand front man and incumbent Brian Mitchell secured one of the two positions for McKinleyville Union School District with a respectable 33.5%. Measure U squeaked through with 52.3% of voter approval for the fiscal consolidation of two Fortuna school districts. Thus far no recounts have been demanded.
STUNNING SCHOOL STATS: The Humboldt County Office of Education Healthy Kids two-year report brings some striking news. 22% of Humboldt County 9th graders currently use marijuana regularly while 29% use alcohol. These figures bump up respectively to 26% and 42% by 11th grade; 37% and 60% if enrolled in an alternative education school. 7% of 9th graders currently smoke tobacco, increasing to 12% by 11th grade. Students in an alternative education setting see 45% smoking. Safety concerns? 5% of 5th graders brought a knife or gun to school. Gang affiliation? 8-9% of 7th, 8th, 9th, and 11th grade students considered themselves a member of a gang.
JUST TOO CUTE: Sequoia Humane Society’s Most Wanted. For those looking to take home a loyal companion there’s also Miranda’s Rescue and the Humboldt County Animal Shelter for some very adorably adoptable pets. My goodness.
JUST TOO UGLY: Eureka Police Department’s Most Wanted. Curiously enough, the Humboldt County Sheriff’s Office doesn’t seem to want anyone– as evidenced here.
‘BELIEVE IT OR NOT’ MEETS ‘ALL THE NEWS THAT FIT TO PRINT’: Or, Robert Ripley meets Ben Bradlee in Dave Stancliff’s amusing and colorful As It Stands column of various sundry laundry items culled from around the planet. Whether it’s Satanic sex stabbings, Britain’s rubber bullets for riotous acts, innocent children locked, loaded, and spun in Wascomat washing machines or the attack of the 50 foot woman, you’ll find it all here and the kitchen sink under Dave’s watchful muse and editorial eye. Dave is also a veteran and currently running for the position of POTUS.
LAST SNIPPETS, RUMORS AND HEARSAY MURMERS:
Humboldt County’s Drug Task Force was informed last week that it will no longer be financially supported by the State Department of Justice—an approximate $213,000 blow to the county’s efforts to curb illegal drug use and sales.
Following the vandalism at Ferndale High School, a car crash, and the three teens involved, the stolen Milk Can Trophy was finally recovered from the woods by the Fortuna Police Department and returned back to its rightful winner.
Humboldt County and the City of Eureka have been trying to organize a temporary winter shelter for the homeless with too much discussion, differing opinions, and numerous emails flying about. Consensus is difficult to reach largely due to the 3 homeless advocates muddying up the waters in addition to Old Town businesses nixing any such idea in their neighborhood. Humboldt County Supervisor Jimmy Smith and Eureka City Councilman Mike Newman have been working tirelessly bringing all parties at the table towards agreement in providing humane solutions and a temporary shelter before temps dip lower come the holidays. Sources indicate the District Attorney’s office and Paul Gallegos have also been trying to resolve the otherwise cold situation. Birds under the weather stay warm together.
One Humboldt town may be growing smarter with their proposed Rio Dell Plaza in the works. Acting as its own developer, the city of Rio Dell is looking at building a large grocery store, 2 motels, a gas station, restaurants, civic buildings, and public space on 20 acres to draw traffic and tourists off the 101 and thwart a 16% unemployment rate.
The City of Arcata, Susan Ornelas, APD, and Kevin Hoover would certainly like to see something done differently for Halloween next year.
Arcata police have been fairly busy this week busting grows: one on Wednesday followed by the other on Thursday.
It’s been a rough week in Arcata, friends. You know it’s bad when our previously mentioned uniquely original and freewheeling thinker Geronimo Garcia gets shot with a BB gun and suffers a stunning electoral loss at the same time.
HUMBOLDT ENTERTAINMENT AND WEEKEND EVENTS:
Cannabis happenings sighted in SoHum: Hemp Fest and Mary Jane: The Musical are around Redway-Town and the Mateel.
Thank you, Veterans, for your service.
I wouldn’t say that poop video went “viral.” It went to a big-money website that was sympathetic to @occupyhumboldt’s false flag goal of discrediting protests.
If something goes viral, you’ll know.
We’d love to speak with you some more about your take on the strange direction Occupy Eureka has taken the OWS movement locally. We may be in Arcata on Tuesday to follow up…
You are welcome. Guard your Constitution if you really want to thank veterans. Protect it from ALL emenies foreign and domestic. ALL.
Down the Memory Hole? It simply never happened? KIEM appears to be moving to scrub all evidence of the infamous Poop and Pee incident from the internets.
Good luck with that. While our column and the link above was hit in the censorship and un-YouTube efforts, Sentinel readers will find the video mirrored and archived here instead.