Categorized | Environment, Features, Media, National

The Dirty Dash– World’s Muddiest Race

 

A Perfect Fit for Humboldt
(VIRAL VIDEO)

 

Skippy Massey
Humboldt Sentinel

 

Have you ever said to yourself, “Marathons are too easy, and Triathlons are for sissies?”

Well, we haven’t either.  Those races are hard.  Really hard.  Think about it.  The first person to run a marathon actually died.  Yes, he died!  And we surmise he didn’t have fun along the way.

Welcome to a new kind of race:  THE DIRTY DASH.  It’s a perfect fit for Humboldt to do.  Or shamelessly imitate.  It’s independently zany, it’s crazy, and it’s wildly colorful.  A racy race that would cause your Grandma to blush her bloomers.

dirty dash1This dirty race puts all other races to shame.  The Dirty Dash is a mud run obstacle course where military boot camp meets your inner five-year-old fantasy.  It converts boy to man, and then man to swine in a really dirty sort of way.

It’s also fun.  And we mean Way Fun.

You’ll need endurance to trudge up mountains of sludge, courage to overcome uncompromising obstacles, a complete lack of shame to wallow in pits of mud, and then a smile to show how happy you are making it through to the end!

This mud-run obstacle course could become your new guilty pleasure and your Facebook wallpage photo.  Going solo or with some of your dirtiest, filthiest, & uncouth friends, you’ll be able to look at yourself in the mirror and say, “I am a Dirty Dasher and there’s no shame in my game!”

dirty dash3Then, and only then, can you proceed to clean yourself off like the cheeky monkey you are.

Eleven 3-5 mile charity races are run throughout the Pacific Northwest and the Southwest– from Oregon to New Mexico– from June through September.  Some of the shorter races also sport a 3 ½ mile shortcut.  Why not?  Everyone loves a shortcut.

They don’t care much about timing the races, either.  It doesn’t matter.  They also run rain or shine, saying:

 “Sdirty dash2eriously?  How can the weather be bad?  Shame on you; your glass is clearly half-empty.  If it rains, even better, more mud!  The Dirty Dash is as dependable as (and far less subsidized than) the US Postal Service and goes on rain or shine, global warming or global cooling.

If it gets too hot, feel free to bask in the mud pit for longer and if it gets too cold, feel free to drop into the fetal position with your teammates and cuddle for warmth.

However, rule #1 is safety first, so if there is lightning, we’ll postpone waves and running until it blows over.  In case anyone was wondering, rule #2 is complete and brutal honesty amongst group members, and rule #3 is everyone hooks up with a local.”

Because it’s a family race, there’s only one version to do.  You Dirty Dash however you need to and however long it takes.

You can walk.  Run.  Crawl.  Wallow.  Skip.  Clamber.  Lollygag.  Grovel.  Just be yourself and just finish before sundown so the coyotes and mosquitoes don’t git ya.  You can run in sublime running shorts or dress up in a flashy costume.  Pets and kids are welcome, too, but not necessarily in that order.  They’ll also take you as on as a volunteer and ease you into this dirty lifestyle nice and slow.  Keep in mind there is an age limit.  It’s 106.

dirty dash5You can run it by yourself or with a team of your favorite friends, enemies and friendemies.  Whoever likes to get dirty or whoever needs to simply get down and dirty in the worst way.  Teams may encourage each other, mock each other, or drag each other over obstacles.  “Feel free to clasp hands, smack bottoms, or open mouth kiss,” the rules say.

Did your last personal record run have a 175-foot slop n’ slide in the middle of it?  Probably not.  And a final finale mud pit?  Nope.  Sprinklers and showers and water blasters?  Heavens to Betsy, no.  While we’re at it, let’s throw in a Pig Sty, a Hog Wash, and a Piglet Plunge.  Now
that’s what we call a race.

Wherever they go, runners completely change the landscape to an ultra muddy hue, making for the most interesting and diverse course ever run.  The course itself, as you can see in the video, is full of obstacles ranging from mud pits, water slides, tires, logs, hay bales, wood structures, to just plain mud, more mud, and even muddier mud everywhere.  Uh, did we say mud?

dirty dash7Why do it?  Exercise?  Maybe.  Camaraderie?  Most likely.  Fun?  You bet your mud-balls.  Good cause? Check.  Besides benefitting your cardiovascular system, each muddy Dirty Dash benefits local charities through the registration fees, online donations, water balloon sales, and shoe donations.

In this viral video best viewed at full-screen resolution, cinematographer Devin Graham filmed a Dirty Dash race taking place in Soldier Hallow, Utah.  The race, like most of them, completely sold out in record time.  Let’s face it:
people love to get dirty when it’s socially acceptable.  A good
Dirty Dash race beats a bad diaper rash case.

It’s a perfect fit for our area– and it would be a muddy hit for someone getting it together for the Humboldt peeps.  Half of our towns would turn out to run and watch.  We would, too.  In two shakes of a kitten’s whiskers.

If you know of someone in our running community interested in putting on something similar, share this with them.

Six Rivers Running Club?  HSU?  Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence?  The Kinetic Sculpture Race or the babelicious Rutabaga and Humboldt Roller Derby Queens?  Justin Bieber? (Sorry, all you Beliebers).  Send it along …and we’d thank you for it!  We’d love to see them all get a bit dirty.  Sarah Palin and Anderson Cooper, too.  We’d pay for that.

dirty dash6After all folks, this isn’t Survivor.  It’s more like Jackass mixed with Dirty Jobs mixed with America’s Got Talent.  And we’d like to have more fun with like-minded Humboldt folks and friends and cheeky monkeys everywhere.

No time for nattering nabobs of negativism here!  It’s time to smile– and run a muck.

If you’d like to know more, you can find out all about these mud races in this link

http://www.thedirtydash.com/

Happy Running.

* * * * * * * *

dirty dash4

(For our Humboldt County runners)

2 Responses to “The Dirty Dash– World’s Muddiest Race”

  1. Running24 says:

    good share.

  2. Stephan says:

    What a cool post and thoughtful webpage. I liked it!! Keep it up, loved the race and the mud and glory.

Trackbacks/Pingbacks


Leave a Reply

HumSentinel on Twitter

RSS Progressive Review

  • Democracy and the 'hood
    From 50 years of our overstocked archives[Remarks at a conference in 2006]Sam SmithWASHINGTON'S advisory neighborhood commissions came out of a time that seems distant today, a time before 9/11, George Bush, the closing of DC's public hospital and the socio-ethnic cleansing of DC.Sure, we were still recovering from the riots, but the very word […]
  • Iatrogenic violence
    From 50 years of our overstocked archives  Sam Smith, 2006 - Reader Dan writes in response to our listing of American corporations tied to Israel: "Do you have a comparable list of corporations that remain silent when a Palestinian bomb explodes aboard an Israeli bus? The policies of the Israeli government are abhorrent, but the tactics of the Palestini […]
  • Transportation news
    Transportation news Bike news High speed, high cost, high income rail What roads and rails tell us about class and power […]
  • Letting a nine year old play in the park alone considered child abuse
    Laura Clawson, Alternet - McDonald's has fired Debra Harrell, the woman who was arrested for letting her nine-year-old daughter play alone at the park while she was at work. Harrell originally had her daughter come to work with her and play on a laptop during her summer vacation, but their home was burglarized and the laptop stolen, so she allowed her d […]
  • Toy wars
    Sam Smith - Regardless of the considerable bias in the mainstream media over little wars like those right now in Palestine and Ukraine, it is important to remember that the big media first and foremost loves toy wars. For example, sending Wolf Blitzer to Israel journalistically makes about as much sense as sending Justin Bieber to report from a girl's s […]
  • Nestle contributes to California water shortage
    Al Jazeera - The Golden State is in the third year of record drought, and while consumer restrictions are not expected to make a sizeable dent in state water usage on their own, officials hope the fines, which go into effect August 1, will send a message to Californians who apparently have yet to grasp the severity of the situation.That message, however, has […]
  • The real economy
    Global Research - The percentage of children in poverty hit 23 percent in 2012, up sharply from 16 percent in 2000. Some states are much worse. For almost the entire American South, the share of children in poverty is higher than 25 percent. […]
  • Infrequently asked questions
    If sanctions are so righteous against Russia's invasion of Ukraine, why not try them against Israel's invasion of Palestine? […]
  • More on Israel's role in building Hamas
     Robert Dreyfuss, Institute for Public Accuracy - In Gaza, between 1967 and 1987, when Hamas was founded, the number of mosques tripled in Gaza from 200 to 600. And a lot of that came with money flowing from outside Gaza, from wealthy conservative Islamists in Saudi Arabia and elsewhere. But, of course, none of this could have happened without the Israelis c […]
  • Pocket paradigms
    Some day our leaders may again be as good as our firefighters..- Sam Smith […]
  • Word
    Those who want the government to regulate matters of the mind and spirit are like men who are so afraid of being murdered that they commit suicide. -- Harry Truman […]
  • Word: Where the Palestinian crisis began
    Donna Nevel, a community psychologist and educator, is a long-time organizer for peace and justice in Palestine/Israel. Most recently, she was a founding member of Jews Say No!, is on the board of Jewish Voice for Peace, and is a member of the coordinating committee of the Nakba Education Project--US.Donna Nevel - As Israeli government violence against the P […]
  • Israel hiring students to troll social media sites
    USA Today - Israel is looking to hire university students to post pro-Israel messages on social media networks — without needing to identify themselves as government-linked, officials said Wednesday.The Israeli prime minister's office said in a statement that students on Israeli university campuses would receive full or partial scholarships to combat an […]
  • The war crimes Israel and Obama are committing
    Shamus Cooke, Anti-War - The two most glaring war crimes Israel is committing – as defined by the Geneva Convention – are the concepts of “collective punishment” and “necessity and proportionality.”Under collective punishment, a warring party cannot respond to an attack by waging war on the attacker’s community, as is clearly happening in Gaza. The clearest […]
  • California drought update
    LA Times -Te groundwater level in the San Bernardino Basin area is at its lowest point in recorded history, officials say.hMeasured in volume, the groundwater level for the basin is now about 500,000 acre-feet below full, according to Douglas Headrick, general manager for the San Bernardino Valley Municipal Water District.That would put it below the previous […]