Stephen Colbert: ‘Want Food Stamps? Become a Massive Corporation’
Stephen Colbert has come up with a novel idea.
The Colbert Report host has figured out a solution as to how poor Americans needing food stamps can get them back after the program was removed from the GOP-controlled House’s recently passed farm bill.
His answer is really simple: Poor people just need to become massive corporations– then Republicans will give them all the welfare they want!
Colbert based his solution on how the Republicans were able to get the most recent version of the farm bill through the House.
He explains that the legislation, which generally provides subsidies for farmers while giving nutritional aid to those in need, had not passed in two years. Among the reasons a previous version didn’t pass earlier this year is because dozens of Republicans wanted deeper cuts to food stamps. So in order to get this one approved, the GOP “reached an historic compromise on food stamps by eliminating the food stamps.”
In Colbert’s clip, CBS’ Bob Schieffer layed it on the table. He called out Republicans for heartlessly removing food stamps from the legislation.
“You pass a farm bill in the House that gives billions of dollars, much of it to large corporations that own farms,” Schieffer told GOP Congressman Mike Kelly of Pennsylvania. “It’s almost like welfare for the wealthy. But you don’t include a dollar for hungry people for food stamps. What kind of message is that?”
Colbert suggested one answer: food stamp surgery.
“Republicans showed that they can compromise by removing the part of the bill they refused to compromise on,” Colbert said. “It’s like a cardiologist who’s having trouble treating a patient’s heart.”
“Rather than getting bogged down with complicated procedures, he simply removes the heart. Problem solved!”
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