Categorized | Media, National, Politics

Food Stamp Surgery

 

Stephen Colbert:  ‘Want Food Stamps?  Become a Massive Corporation’

(VIDEO)

 

Skippy Massey
Humboldt Sentinel

 

 Stephen Colbert has come up with a novel idea.

The Colbert Report host has figured out a solution as to how poor Americans needing food stamps can get them back after the program was removed from the GOP-controlled House’s recently passed farm bill.

His answer is really simple:  Poor people just need to become massive corporations– then Republicans will give them all the welfare they want!

Colbert based his solution on how the Republicans were able to get the most recent version of the farm bill through the House.

He explains that the legislation, which generally provides subsidies for farmers while giving nutritional aid to those in need, had not passed in two years.  Among the reasons a previous version didn’t pass earlier this year is because dozens of Republicans wanted deeper cuts to food stamps.  So in order to get this one approved, the GOP “reached an historic compromise on food stamps by eliminating the food stamps.”

In Colbert’s clip, CBS’ Bob Schieffer layed it on the table.  He called out Republicans for heartlessly removing food stamps from the legislation.

“You pass a farm bill in the House that gives billions of dollars, much of it to large corporations that own farms,” Schieffer told GOP Congressman Mike Kelly of Pennsylvania.  “It’s almost like welfare for the wealthy.  But you don’t include a dollar for hungry people for food stamps.   What kind of message is that?”

Colbert suggested one answer:  food stamp surgery.

“Republicans showed that they can compromise by removing the part of the bill they refused to compromise on,” Colbert said.  “It’s like a cardiologist who’s having trouble treating a patient’s heart.”

“Rather than getting bogged down with complicated procedures, he simply removes the heart.  Problem solved!”

* * * * * * * * *

2 Responses to “Food Stamp Surgery”

  1. SoCoDave says:

    One wonders why this is even called a Farm Bill. $700B of the $940B that was in the bill was for food stamps. Why welfare and farm policy/welfare were put together into an on-going program was/is somewhat perplexing. Personally, I’m against farm subsidies.

    I’m not enamored with food stamps either. But, if food stamp fraud was punishable by 5 years in prison and required restitution, and funding was adequate to monitor potential fraud, I could be persuaded to agree to a system that required stringent rules to allow taxpayer fundsspecific foods to be purchased by those who can’t afford to buy food either with their personal income or other with government they are already receiving with .

  2. SoCoDave says:

    Oops! Didn’t think I hit “submit comment”, but apparently I did. While my previous comment has errors due to posting before completing my thoughts, you either get the point or not.

Trackbacks/Pingbacks


Leave a Reply

HumSentinel on Twitter

RSS Progressive Review

  • Democracy and the 'hood
    From 50 years of our overstocked archives[Remarks at a conference in 2006]Sam SmithWASHINGTON'S advisory neighborhood commissions came out of a time that seems distant today, a time before 9/11, George Bush, the closing of DC's public hospital and the socio-ethnic cleansing of DC.Sure, we were still recovering from the riots, but the very word […]
  • Iatrogenic violence
    From 50 years of our overstocked archives  Sam Smith, 2006 - Reader Dan writes in response to our listing of American corporations tied to Israel: "Do you have a comparable list of corporations that remain silent when a Palestinian bomb explodes aboard an Israeli bus? The policies of the Israeli government are abhorrent, but the tactics of the Palestini […]
  • Transportation news
    Transportation news Bike news High speed, high cost, high income rail What roads and rails tell us about class and power […]
  • Letting a nine year old play in the park alone considered child abuse
    Laura Clawson, Alternet - McDonald's has fired Debra Harrell, the woman who was arrested for letting her nine-year-old daughter play alone at the park while she was at work. Harrell originally had her daughter come to work with her and play on a laptop during her summer vacation, but their home was burglarized and the laptop stolen, so she allowed her d […]
  • Toy wars
    Sam Smith - Regardless of the considerable bias in the mainstream media over little wars like those right now in Palestine and Ukraine, it is important to remember that the big media first and foremost loves toy wars. For example, sending Wolf Blitzer to Israel journalistically makes about as much sense as sending Justin Bieber to report from a girl's s […]
  • Nestle contributes to California water shortage
    Al Jazeera - The Golden State is in the third year of record drought, and while consumer restrictions are not expected to make a sizeable dent in state water usage on their own, officials hope the fines, which go into effect August 1, will send a message to Californians who apparently have yet to grasp the severity of the situation.That message, however, has […]
  • The real economy
    Global Research - The percentage of children in poverty hit 23 percent in 2012, up sharply from 16 percent in 2000. Some states are much worse. For almost the entire American South, the share of children in poverty is higher than 25 percent. […]
  • Infrequently asked questions
    If sanctions are so righteous against Russia's invasion of Ukraine, why not try them against Israel's invasion of Palestine? […]
  • More on Israel's role in building Hamas
     Robert Dreyfuss, Institute for Public Accuracy - In Gaza, between 1967 and 1987, when Hamas was founded, the number of mosques tripled in Gaza from 200 to 600. And a lot of that came with money flowing from outside Gaza, from wealthy conservative Islamists in Saudi Arabia and elsewhere. But, of course, none of this could have happened without the Israelis c […]
  • Pocket paradigms
    Some day our leaders may again be as good as our firefighters..- Sam Smith […]
  • Word
    Those who want the government to regulate matters of the mind and spirit are like men who are so afraid of being murdered that they commit suicide. -- Harry Truman […]
  • Word: Where the Palestinian crisis began
    Donna Nevel, a community psychologist and educator, is a long-time organizer for peace and justice in Palestine/Israel. Most recently, she was a founding member of Jews Say No!, is on the board of Jewish Voice for Peace, and is a member of the coordinating committee of the Nakba Education Project--US.Donna Nevel - As Israeli government violence against the P […]
  • Israel hiring students to troll social media sites
    USA Today - Israel is looking to hire university students to post pro-Israel messages on social media networks — without needing to identify themselves as government-linked, officials said Wednesday.The Israeli prime minister's office said in a statement that students on Israeli university campuses would receive full or partial scholarships to combat an […]
  • The war crimes Israel and Obama are committing
    Shamus Cooke, Anti-War - The two most glaring war crimes Israel is committing – as defined by the Geneva Convention – are the concepts of “collective punishment” and “necessity and proportionality.”Under collective punishment, a warring party cannot respond to an attack by waging war on the attacker’s community, as is clearly happening in Gaza. The clearest […]
  • California drought update
    LA Times -Te groundwater level in the San Bernardino Basin area is at its lowest point in recorded history, officials say.hMeasured in volume, the groundwater level for the basin is now about 500,000 acre-feet below full, according to Douglas Headrick, general manager for the San Bernardino Valley Municipal Water District.That would put it below the previous […]