Categorized | Media, National, Politics

Food Stamp Surgery

 

Stephen Colbert:  ‘Want Food Stamps?  Become a Massive Corporation’

(VIDEO)

 

Skippy Massey
Humboldt Sentinel

 

 Stephen Colbert has come up with a novel idea.

The Colbert Report host has figured out a solution as to how poor Americans needing food stamps can get them back after the program was removed from the GOP-controlled House’s recently passed farm bill.

His answer is really simple:  Poor people just need to become massive corporations– then Republicans will give them all the welfare they want!

Colbert based his solution on how the Republicans were able to get the most recent version of the farm bill through the House.

He explains that the legislation, which generally provides subsidies for farmers while giving nutritional aid to those in need, had not passed in two years.  Among the reasons a previous version didn’t pass earlier this year is because dozens of Republicans wanted deeper cuts to food stamps.  So in order to get this one approved, the GOP “reached an historic compromise on food stamps by eliminating the food stamps.”

In Colbert’s clip, CBS’ Bob Schieffer layed it on the table.  He called out Republicans for heartlessly removing food stamps from the legislation.

“You pass a farm bill in the House that gives billions of dollars, much of it to large corporations that own farms,” Schieffer told GOP Congressman Mike Kelly of Pennsylvania.  “It’s almost like welfare for the wealthy.  But you don’t include a dollar for hungry people for food stamps.   What kind of message is that?”

Colbert suggested one answer:  food stamp surgery.

“Republicans showed that they can compromise by removing the part of the bill they refused to compromise on,” Colbert said.  “It’s like a cardiologist who’s having trouble treating a patient’s heart.”

“Rather than getting bogged down with complicated procedures, he simply removes the heart.  Problem solved!”

* * * * * * * * *

2 Responses to “Food Stamp Surgery”

  1. SoCoDave says:

    One wonders why this is even called a Farm Bill. $700B of the $940B that was in the bill was for food stamps. Why welfare and farm policy/welfare were put together into an on-going program was/is somewhat perplexing. Personally, I’m against farm subsidies.

    I’m not enamored with food stamps either. But, if food stamp fraud was punishable by 5 years in prison and required restitution, and funding was adequate to monitor potential fraud, I could be persuaded to agree to a system that required stringent rules to allow taxpayer fundsspecific foods to be purchased by those who can’t afford to buy food either with their personal income or other with government they are already receiving with .

  2. SoCoDave says:

    Oops! Didn’t think I hit “submit comment”, but apparently I did. While my previous comment has errors due to posting before completing my thoughts, you either get the point or not.

Trackbacks/Pingbacks


Leave a Reply

HumSentinel on Twitter

RSS Progressive Review

  • Department of Good Stuff: Good news
    You can't do better than Yes Magazine […]
  • Real economics
     An increase in GDP doesn't pay the cable bill […]
  • UN secretary general to join climate demonstrators
    Ban Ki-Moon, UN Secretary General - The Climate Summit that I am convening one week from today has two goals: to mobilize political will for a universal and meaningful climate agreement next year in Paris; and second to generate ambitious steps to reduce greenhouse gas emissions and strengthen resilience. We are anticipating an impressive turnout of leaders […]
  • Obama telling us one thing about ground troops, his generals another
    Nation - President Obama has repeatedly declared there will be no combat troops on the ground in Iraq to fight the Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant. But a Senate hearing Tuesday with top US military officials revealed that pronouncement is on very shaky ground—there is now no question ground troops are under active consideration at the highest levels of […]
  • The real economy
    Census Bureau & Federal Reserve […]
  • Ten ways to cut poverty
    Talk Poverty […]
  • Common Core trashs critics in ad
    Curmudgucation[Update: The video has gone away. The Youtube account "Common Core," a group of filmmakers from around the country, has shut down after only three days.]As your grandad would not say, "OMG!"The media group 617 has produced a video in support of the Core that is apparently intended to embarrass its opponents into silence. It […]
  • Pocket paradigms
    Laws should be handled like prescription drugs, but many of our politicians think of them as being more like popcorn or M&Ms -- something to munch on. This is unfortunate since much of America's success to date can be traced to one simple rule: don't make too many rules. Much of America's failure to date has come from ignoring this rule. - […]
  • Word
    To those who have hunger, give bread. To those who have bread, give a hunger for Justice. - Latin American grace […]
  • Recovered history: How newspapers can save themselves
    From 50 uyears of our overstocked archives Sam Smith, 2009  - It's been about 17 years since I last offered any advice to Don Graham of the Washington Post. He wasn't interested. Oddly, about a year later, the circulation of American newspapers, including the Post, began a slow decline that continues to this day.This morning, however, I was so stru […]
  • What American exceptionalism is really about
    Bill Blum, Anti-Empire Report - Frances Fitzgerald, in her famous study of American school textbooks, summarized the message of these books: “The United States has been a kind of Salvation Army to the rest of the world: throughout history it had done little but dispense benefits to poor, ignorant, and diseased countries. The U.S. always acted in a disinteres […]
  • Obama is fourth president in a row to announce plans to bomb Iraq
    Orazz […]
  • Department of Good Stuff: Education
    Bad Ass Teachers Chicago Teachers Union Susan Ohanian Diane Ravitch Teach 4 Real Ed Notes Online Valerie Strauss Opt Out […]
  • Race to the Bottom: Harvard Business School
    Naked Capitalism - Three years ago, Harvard Business School asked thousands of its graduates, many of whom are leaders of America’s top companies, where their firms had decided to locate jobs in the previous year. The responses led the researchers to declare a “competitiveness problem” at home: HBS Alumni reported 56 separate instances where they moved 1,000 […]
  • 1600 US troops in Iraq allegedly will keep theiir boots off the ground
    Washington Post - There will be 1,600 U.S. troops in Iraq by the time President Obama’s current plans are fully in place — but none of those are considered combat troops, which means the U.S. is not officially reengaged in the war there, Defense Secretary Chuck Hagel told Congress on Tuesday.“Instead, these advisers are supporting Iraqi and Kurdish forces in […]